Are you hoping to live a life with self-mastery over your emotions?

Are you yearning to have power to control the fears, anguish, frustrations, and anxieties that have been making your life miserable?

Are you looking forward to live a life which you can reach your highest potential and enjoying even both the intrinsic and extrinsic rewards that come with a successful life?

Good news! All these aspirations and hopes are possible.

Through my over 18 years of psychotherapy practices and working with over 1000 clients, I have developed a proprietary approach to help you gain self-mastery over your beliefs, values and thought patterns; and maximising your potential and live a renewed life: the RENEW program:

R – Recognise your symptoms
E – Evaluate your past and current self
N – be Nice to your weaknesses and strengths
E – Embrace who you are
W – woo yourself

This is a holistic program that goes beyond just providing temporary relief to any emotional issues you may suffer from. It starts with an inward journey, looking beyond the symptoms to uncover your limiting beliefs system and false assumptions.

This is followed by applying the relevant psychotherapy techniques to recreate your inner beliefs; and filling your life with positive inertia stemming from your true self and unrealised potential.

The RENEW program

Let’s take a more detailed look at the 5-stage RENEW program.

The First Stage: Recognise your symptoms (R)

This stage aims to help you decode the symptoms you are experiencing: whether you have issues with depression, anxiety, anger, and so on. These symptoms are telling clues that you are not living your life meaningfully and effectively, thus affecting your daily functioning and ability to cope with challenges.

At this initial stage, I will assess your thought processes and behaviours to determine the exact issues you are suffering from. Some signs to look out for are:

• crying frequently and for no obvious reasons
• feeling of inferiority
• thoughts of suicide
• types of uncontrollable emotions
• feeling hopeless for a prolong period
• feeling depressed for a prolong period
• feeling stressed/angry/anxious for a prolong period
• having difficulty in making friends
• not able to work in a team
• not able to perform to satisfaction
• not able to get along with your spouse, children, parents, or relatives

“There is no need to suffer silently and there is no shame in seeking help.”

– Catherine Zeta Jones 

The Second Stage: Evaluate your past and current self (E)

This step takes you to self-awareness or self-discovery. You have so much value, talents, gifting that is awaiting you to rediscover. Yes, I use the word rediscover because you might have known your talents but have been buried or denied over the years because of setbacks in life.

We will spend a considerable amount of time in this stage to assess yourself truthfully, and I will help you do so objectively without judgment or shame. You will reconnect with the person you once were – to your true endowed nature which is waiting to bloom and shine.

“Self-awareness is the ability to take an honest look at your life without any attachment to it being right or wrong, good or bad.”

– Debbie Ford

In this stage, I will also help you uncover the obstacles that have prevented you from connecting to your true self and talents all these years. I will help you look beyond the superficial emotions you are currently facing.

Using specialised psychotherapy techniques such as EMDR, Schema, Inner Child therapy, I will help you unmask the hidden underneath emotions which have plagued you all this while without you knowing.

To have self-mastery is to own all these hidden emotions that you have amassed over the years. These emotions are accumulated through your experiences with the environment that has affected you unfavourably since childhood days.

“We cannot change what we are not aware of, and once we are aware, we cannot help but change.”

– Sheryl Sanberg

This stage of self-discovery is very critical. Being self-aware is not about finding fault with yourself nor seeing yourself with so much weaknesses or blemishes. It is about understanding how such perceptions have been formed over the years and the struggles you have put up with all these years in your life.

The process of self-discovery can create some discomfort as you may need to face some unpleasant emotions. However, when you cross this stage, which all my clients did, you will achieve extraordinary breakthroughs that will transform your life from then onwards. You will feel cleansed, released, unstuck, and transformed.

Meanwhile, you can click on the following website links to take free online assessments to understand your personalities:

• https://www.16personalities.com/
• https://www.123test.com/personality-test/
• https://www.truity.com/test/big-five-personality-test
• https://mybrainfitlife.com/

If you need specialised assessment, do contact us as we have corporate partners (psychologists and psychiatrists) who can conduct psychological and psychiatric assessment.

The Third Stage: be Nice to your weaknesses and strengths (N)

Next stage is making peace with yourself by acceptance of all that has shaped your life: the way you function and your thought patterns which have negatively affected in your life. I will guide you to learn to accept all about yourself (including what has happened to you) and stop believing that something is wrong with you. I will utilise psychotherapy approach such as mindfulness and cognitive behaviour therapy.

This process will help you let go of various baggage from the past, such as resentment and hatred. I will guide you to stop blaming yourself and stop living in a vicious cycle of unending failure state. You will know and accept who you really are, all the weaknesses and goodness in you, and what you are endowed with. You will learn to regain your personal leadership.

“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”

– Carl Rogers

The Fourth Stage: Embrace who you are (E)

Once you get past the above 3 stages, this is a stage where I will guide you to eradicate all the negative vibes living in you and to rewire your brain to accept positive things and to keep them permanently in your mind.

Neuroscientists have recently discovered that our brain is malleable or a term they used – ‘neuroplasticity’. The good news is that you can rewire your thought patterns and habits no matter how old or how young you are. I will guide you on how you can teach your mind new tricks and develop new habits and thought patterns in this fourth stage.

“Believing you can and you’re half way there.”

– Theodore Roosevelt

Using psychotherapeutic approach such as journaling, writing to young self, and visualisation, you will learn to appreciate yourself for who you are, the gifts you are endowed with, the people around you, and the opportunities you had. Through this process, you will learn to be grateful for what you have and treasure them. You will learn to enjoy the contentment, joy and an inner peace within you.

“You see the world not as it is, but as we are – or, as we are conditioned to see it. When we open our mouths to describe what we see, we in effect describe ourselves, our perceptions, our paradigms.”

– Stephen Covey

In this stage, I will guide you to leverage on your strengths endowed in you and to polish them further to see them grow and shine. Instead of denying your weaknesses, we will work on what you can improve and accept what cannot. This is confidence which imbue self-respect, self-worth, and self-value. You will learn to own your life and your story and be the leading hero or heroine of your own story. When you can let go of these self-limiting beliefs and instead embrace positive beliefs, you allow your aspirations to rise to greater heights.

With self-belief (not self-aggrandization or self-absorption), you will learn to see a new you, a complete transformation.

“Self-belief does not necessarily ensure success, but self-disbelief assuredly spawns failure.”

– Albert Bandura

The Fifth Stage: Woo yourself (W)

When you can appreciate yourself and accept all of yourself, you will then truly love yourself. In this stage, I will help you discover what a lovable person you actually are. You will learn to be your own best friend.

If you can love yourself, you can woo yourself freely and enthusiastically. You will treasure and appreciate yourself. When you are able to love yourself, you will receive the love from others. You will be so filled with love that you can give love generously to people around you. You will learn to cultivate the love that is genuine and authentic and not fake to please people.

Loving yourself means to look at your authentic selves in entirety – the good, the bad, the ugly – with honesty and courage, with kindness and tenderness, without flinching, without self-hatred, shame or condemnation.

Once you have achieved that inner mastery, the leader in you can’t wait to birth.

At this stage, you will experience the contentment and peace you have with yourself. No more unending struggles, fighting losing battles daily, living with a host of embittered emotions, even to the point of affecting your physical health.

This is not the point where once you reached, you will stay there free of trouble. In the future, you will still go through life’s encounter giving you headaches and pains. However, with the inner mastery, you will bounce back faster and continuously reaching new heights in your life. You will live a life filled with gratitude, experiencing and seeing things in a positive light. You are on two steps back, three steps forward upward climb.

You will notice flowers along the way and the scents from it. Your footsteps will be light and you will sway with the winds and flow with your steps.

Join the RENEW program

With the help of the RENEW program, you will no longer be the person who is controlled by self-defeating beliefs. You can begin to live out your life based on your true nature and potential.

Take the first step to make a difference in your life. Make an appointment now.

Your life can be renewed.

The information, including but not limited to, text, graphics, images, video, and other material in this article are for informational purposes only. No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.